2003-05-06 - 3:13 p.m.

"Ordinary World". What a song. I liked it long ago, before I really knew what unhappiness was. I liked it again when .. I can't quite remember exactly, but it was a down period and I associated with the message of somehow finding a way to move on.

Today, folding clothes, I put on my new "Down but on the up" mix and Ordinary World played first. This time the line that caught in my throat was "Where is my friend when I need you most". I think, of all the things I feel I've lost, the most bitter is that sense of endless bestfriendship that could never be broken until one of us died. I really thought I had that, and, now, where is it? I don't know. I didn't think that could happen.

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