2003-09-17 - 11:13 a.m.

Well, it's official, Saara and I want to try having a relationship again :D

So sudden, yet so right, and so inexplicable to anyone but each other, we both simply can not come up with any reasons why we should continue to be apart. Starting with a chance reunion on ICQ this past Sunday (well, late Saturday night since I had insomnia) we have found the most astonishing reconnection has occurred. We've been everpresent in the other's thoughts for the entire time and we've spent so much of our available (and some which should have been reserved for sleep, methinks ;) time together that we have communicated more thoughts, feelings and opinions that many married couples do in years.

The phone just rang and for the first time in months I perked up thinking it might be for me. :-* :)

So anyway, yeah, this morning my first thought on waking was "man, I've slept in pretty late.. it's very sunny", followed by "Ohhhhhhhhhh Yeah! *VBG* ", followed by "man, I need to start getting more regular sleep", interrupted by "OHHHHHHH YEAH!! *VVBG* ". I lay there semi-comatose, drifting in a grinning state of happy being, wondering how I was going to get out of bed and what time it might be, when the idea of writing this entry popped into my head and I suddenly, literally, jumped out of bed to write it.

Enough of this entry has been devoted to my future self ;) Now I won't feel guilty if the rest is for you heh heh. Thank you thank you so much for giving me so much energy this morning, for giving me so much soothing in the past days, for scattering my sad and empty longing for other days with your burst of sunlight, and oh, most especially, for being the soulmate I was so desperately seeking. Thank you for transmuting the big 3-0 from impending crashing tower of doom to shining portal of future possibility. Thank you for introducing me to guava jelly and wonderbar Yahoo! emoticons :-* Thank you for not only listening to me ramble about the things that fascinate me but for understanding and being so receptive, attentive, and naturally curious of the things that I think at my level. Thank you for appreciating me, for thinking of me, doing nice things for me, in an amazing varied number of ways considering we've only been "talking" for the past 3 1/2 days. Thank you :) Thank you for being the exact match for my level of enthusiasm of where things are going, yet at the same time having a cautionary voice at the back of the mind playing devil's advocate. You bring new meaning to the tired phrase "other half", because for once I really do know what that other half is feeling, wanting, thinking, wishing, on such a more complete and fulfilling level than ever before. Hmmm.. this constant feeling of thankfulness is a small part of the glow that's pervading me. All because of you. Thank you.

And I just realized I'm not signed in to Yahoo. I think I just woke up. I'm glad, though, that I took the time out to write this entry because I probably wouldn't have finished it if I'd thought of Yahoo earlier ;) hehe. So yes, here it is, the perfect entry for today, completing the circle that little bit more.

Lol funny thought: I would be sitting here literally all day, typing till the sun went down and my fingers were raw, if I wanted to relate in my rambling, all encompassing, no detail missing, to-my-future-self kind of way all the things that we talked about in one single phone call last night.

Yes. To return to the beginning of the entry, it is most ideal for me to lay claim to you now, and to broadcast publicly my declaration of intention to be yours. Because this must continue. I could not afford to lose what I have discovered. You are my most precious find and you must be mine :-*

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