2005-06-19 - 6:50 a.m.

it started when I parked at a sliding hill. There were some ancient ruined towers just over the hill and a bunch of kids playing on it. I slogged through the snow up to it.

The next time I saw it, much later on, I was ll alone and there was deep snow, no traces, and this empty wooden multipart stair walkwauy to the crest but I never went. I was trying to find my little red car to get my camear (the 2nd time) to catch a pic of the perfect snowy misty sunrise.. yellows and oranges piercing sapinss avec lots of neige.

The real dream started when I went into the secret fortress. Oh my god.. amazing. Anyway, it was a run-down room, with a long history of drunks. I had passed this test, however, so someone led me into the entrance, a shabby kitchen with a single mom .. through here, we got into the lair proper.

I was given an orientation. I was excited, lookinf forward to it. I had all these pamplets and cards and credits for stuff.. Everything was free.I got to try out alll this cool stuff and see all the equ9ipment. I was going to be spending alot of time here and be accomplishing a lot., I decided anyway.

there was a dream segment where I was in a dorm, with some of the kids from high school I remember.. Dave... no others names come. I had my little bed spot, and at one point I was climbing up this wooden ladder that led to a duct=shaped tunnel near the rooof with wooden rungs under me.

IO
I was heading to a computer to do something.. I had remembered something or figured something out, and wanted to go on to the computer. This was the first time I woke up.

Back asleep, I dreamed of the picture taking, then st
struggled to get my camera.. halfway through this segment, I realized I was getting farther wawy from the car, so I did the matrix thing I learned in a past dream, I stopped adhering to the dream world�s rules. I jumped up.. higher than a person can.. then I was on a near-cliff face, snowy.. rough granite. I had no support.. but I just thought �up! up! up! up!� and was rising, floating. Then, on top, I shut my eyes and cbent my knees and jumped my hardest.. I opened them when I felt myself stop rising and I waas seeing an opengl world, featureless near the top, and anyway I was heading straight for my car. There was a lightpost on the way. I was parked next to an extremely high fence.

Instead of taking a picture, this is when I realized that taking a picture was useless. I could actually visualize what it would mean, holding the camera (if I could even do that, which I didn�t bleieve) while I was sleeping, dreaming, and taking a picture.. and relalized I wouldn�t see what was in the dream, even though I thought of taking a picture of my brain. I realized it was pointless.

The next thing was I was around a tiny clapboard house. There was a bear inside. a happy frumpy bear like in the cottonnelle commercials, but still, a bear. I don�t know why, but I was going around looking in the windows and .. then I was teasing it or something. I felt like I wanted to risk , and it was getting upset. I had upset it. Anyway, I ended up grabbing a plastic chari and breaking this lonely window. The bear emerged and we w

IO was running away. I was on the far side of the house from it (a smlal lot with old dead trees in it and a little snow, nothing else. the fence was only 15 feet from the walls at most. I climbed this dead birch tree and it leaned way over. I was tricking the bear, because I knew I was more powerful than I appeared. The bear came around the house and uprooted a nearby tree, then I jumped down and uprooted my tree, and we swung them at each other. Finally, the ruse up, I simply grabbed the bear
�s hide and flung it. It came back, swung its paw against my face and there were these 4 massive claws against my throat, but the moment was frozen. I was in control, examining. I overruled, and the fight was history. history.

Then I was in the fortress again. I don�t think I was looking for how to get into the computer room yet. I was near this charismatic young man. He was writing in a notbeook and I was following him I think. He was part of this strang duo. Anyway, I didn�t like him for some reason. But I needed to learn more about how to get where I was going. Anywya, the worst part of the dream comes.. He got to the end of his spieel, by this time there were a few of us around, and a girl I liked.The last thing on his list was to masturbate. I thought this was just strange � sick � to be kept to oneself. He ducked into a tent and the girl followed right away. I was about to leave when I heard him start talking to her, like directing her, which suddenly changed my maind. I peeked in, didn�t quite see anything, but realized instead of masturbating it was her who was supposed to be masturbating him. This changed things. I decided to look closer. I stuck my head in and there was a mini-orgy going on, with 4 people. The girl I liked and 3 others. I got in the tent and then the guy was gone, and it was just me, clothed, the girl I liked xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxx I started to take down my pants, slowly, and before I finished, everyone else did. Then one xxx x xxxxxxxxx said �the person who winws is the one who gets finished first� or ssomething to that effect. Very distrubing. I never did touch anyone.

It�s at this point I started looking for the young man again, the charismatic one that had led us into the tent. I was very surprised he had dissappeared, although now I know where he went, and I think I knew as of the getting into the tent myself...

Rhi
TR
This is where my search begins in earnest. I was hugging some equipment at this part of the dream, something for the computer. I was two smmall apparatuses, strung together with a bit of calbe.. and I was searching some of the equipment I�d been shown earlier. I wasn�t sure exactly what I was looking for , but was sure I�d recognize it once I found it.

I wandreed around from room to room in this huge mazy-like fortress. I passed the strangest site � sight. The charismatic man and his young christian-looking cohort were holding court over the ranks of ttheir disciples. The two leaders where in large separate spas, strapped to huge bells that reached past the tops of their heads. THey were covered in bubbles so this was a sexless scene. Their disciples were all in a large round pool that was and were facing these two. A

As I was walking by one time (of 2), the female leader was looking righteously pissed about something and decided it was enough to warrnat jumping up and down, ringing the massive bell behind her. Her cohort respected her action, since it held the key to his power too, but he didn�t join, and looked a little dreary.

I was too busy to spend much attention here. I was getting frantic, eagerly searching for the computer room.. that access tunnel near the roof where one climbed like a monkey.

I must have been shown a particular room, because I was trying to get back to it, but I kept getting into dead ends or places I recognized as places I�d been that weren�t the right one.

I can�t describe the actual rooms I ended up in, but each seemed to have a purpose, and there werre a lot of peopole around the fortress.. I asked various people, some who had been there a long time.

Everyone was sort of vague. They all semed to want to help, without genuinely caring or seeming to know much about what was going on. I got some directions, some blank stares, and at all cases shuffled off to find what I was looking for. I only lugged my apparatuseses for a brief time, then was empty handed but decided to continue my quest. I asked an asked, searched and searched. I felt like the sopy in impossible mission.

Sometimes I would think I had found it, but was only near some computer-like equipment, or some too-small access vent. Sometimes people I�d ask were sure they knew what I was looking for, and would eagerly show me something, but it wasn�t at all what I was after, and I was gne.

Once, I made my way back to the entrance kitchen, and peeked out the door into the drunk room, just to be sure, but I recognized it and decided to head back into the laburinth instead of giving up.

This is near the end of the dream... I ended up in what looked like a movie lobby.. desperately asking people now. I don�t remember eactly how, but I got onto a large stair.. a very strange one at that, imagine a huge cylindre divided in half to create alternating floors that are semi-circles, each with a connecting stair to the next level up around the edge along the wall. Each semi circle floor was about 20 feet long along the diameter. I was being guided up these as part of a group, including a strongman in a suit who had a long neck. Well, his neck got long anyway.

This seemed an official part of the tour.. like I had lost control. These pepoole were all-knowing but no-helping, in other words. At one po
btw, I had dreamed this before, somehow, but it is almost not remembered. Just the important fact, I think.

As I was going up this thing, I realized I didn�t want to be, but there seemed snothing else to do. Someoene�thing�resident of the mazre fortress was following behind a floor, but I could see thorugh and this being suddenly screamed and its skin �... melted onto it, putting it in agony. I don�t know if this is what triggered remembering, I just kow I realized I was probably going the wrong way. I wanted to check and see if this was the right way.. although I had the sinking feeling I was lost.. as in lost to fate.

I was told by the strongman that there was no going back. This is when I ran up ahead a bit, and stood on a small stump-line cylinder next to the first stiar, wh( to the next leve) which gave me enough height to jump and see what the next level looked like. It was exactly like the one wer were on, except void of people. This is when I decided to go back, but the strong man had me.

IO
I looked up at him, and above his suit, his neck stretched and stretched, with large bulging muscles that flexed as he grew more and more furious. He looked at me from behind his sunglasses and seetheed about how there was no turning back or something.. I don�t remember, but iI remember that this is when my skin boiled.. and.. wow I�m crawling now. my skin was like bubbly all over, and I knew that it had been since I stepped onto these levels, but I just hadn�t been aware. I was heading back down the levels, though, somehow.. most aware though of my ..@!!! no! I almost forgot.

It was while the strongman held me that I realized one of the people in the gropup (of about 54) was my grandfather! I was pleading, crying even, wanting to go to the computer place.. and he .. somehoe he was the boss of everything here. He was mad, upset at me, but willing to please me, so he said �fine, if that�s all you wanted, I�ll let you go there. I�l�

�but where is it��!!�� I wailed.. to which he said he�ed even bring me there himself.

At that point I knew I�d make it, since somehow the whole fortress was his. He had power.. anyway, as we went back tdown the levels, I was on fire.. my skin was burning, melted, and bubbling all over, but I didn�t care. I knew I would get through the agony, and that I was heading toward where I had been searching for all this time. I followed him.....

b ack in the laburyinth, I was seeing a place I hadn�t seen before.. oddly, some crab-shaped thing was handed to someone near me, and as it passed , it said hello quite clearly. I marvelled at this and my grandfather threw it in the trash. My grandmother was suddenly ther, and my grandfather was busyy with something. I continued searching a bit thinking this hallway looked promising. I opened a narrow door and it was a bathroom. I looked back, said to my grandmother (great! a bathroom) and got in.. at which point I was outside the whole building, betting a histor of it. It was like an old abandoned church that my grandfather had turned into a fortrewss.. and the whole country side had become abandoned and when the house became very disrepaired, he reinforced the stronghold part underneath � inside with a shell that the house could rot areound.

My view got increasingly high up, far away from this house, seeing the cround church spire top... and thaen it all faded. I woke up.

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